The Bachelor – The Women Tell…some stuff

I’m a little later than usual with this update. For those of you waiting for this with bated breath, I both apologize and suggest you find something else to do. This week’s been a little stressful so far so when Peter suggested a bicycle ride along the dike, I jumped at the chance to get outside. It’s a beautiful, sunny day here in the Fraser Valley.

This week’s episode of The Bachelor was the Women Tell All (WTA) episode. This is always an enjoyable show to watch but doesn’t offer a lot of action for recap. The major difference between this WTA and ones in previous season was that one of Ben’s 2 final women showed up. Guess which one it was? That’s right, Courtney! Her appearance probably made for the most interesting time of the episode. Not every woman was there but the crucial (ie: most filmed) ones from the season were and they each had a turn on the Chris Harrison “hot seat”. The whole thing was filmed in front of an audience of mostly women and a few scattered, sad men.

  • Blakely was first on the hot seat. Apparently she was very mean to Rachel the first night. I don’t remember seeing that.
  • Samantha still speaks very negatively toward and about Blakely. Samantha’s pretty annoying in this whole thing. I’m glad she wasn’t on the show for long.
  • Jamie (she of the embarrassing kiss) makes the great observation that they were all rude to someone else at some point. She gets shot down for telling this truth.
  • Blakely and Courtney both rubbed some of the other girls the wrong way but I think the big difference is that when Blakely saw how her behaviour was making others feel she realized that it would be easier on her to be nicer and she changed her behaviour. Courtney didn’t make any such change.
  • Brittney (who turned down a one-on-one date and went home early) says that she was never attracted to Ben. Her time is precious and she had better things to do. Good for you! She also says that she thought Lindzi deserved the date and she’s glad she did it.
  • Samantha tries to make it look like she and Brittney are friends but Brittney won’t go along and calls Samantha a chihuahua, because she never stops yapping.
  • Shawntel (from Brad’s season who showed up to fight for Ben) was next on the hot seat. She and Chris Harrison clearly get along well.
  • We review the rose ceremony where Shawntel showed up and how she was bullied by the other women. (I use the word ‘bullied’ intentionally here because I think they were extremely rude and unkind to her and we only saw a few minutes of the hours she had to spend with them.)
  • Elyse straight up apologizes to Shawntel, which I applaud. Rachel feels “a little guilty”. Rachel, that’s not an apology. You would have looked better if you kept your mouth shut. Erika, who probably said the meanest things (about Shawntel’s personal appearance) doesn’t apologize at all and instead tries to defend herself. Emily (my favourite) tells Shawntel she’s stunning and if Shawntel weren’t so clearly awesome none of them would have been concerned.
  • Emily (the rapping epidemiologist) is next on the hot seat.
  • She really liked Ben but a negative element was introduced to their relationship when she tried to warn him about Courtney. She says she is bothered to see anybody misled but thinks Ben began to see her as an antagonist to Courtney (his favourite).
  • I think Emily has a pretty good head on her shoulders (as much as anyone who goes on this show can!). She says that Ben disrespected all of them by skinny-dipping with Courtney (true) and that the type of guy she wants to be with would have been respectful of her opinion, not tell her to “tread lightly”.
  • Emily’s clearly over Ben and says that he’s made his bed and has to live with her own choices. I’m glad to see her move on.
  • Nicki, next on the hot seat, has not moved on. She makes more than one mention that Ben is still the best guy ever. I don’t understand how any woman could watch this whole season and think that. Nicki, raise your standards!
  • Throughout the episode, you can see Kacie and Nicki holding hands and whispering to each other. They clearly became good friends and it’s sweet to watch.
  • Kacie (a crowd favourite) is next in the hot seat. She says she can see now that their core values were different and I think (I hope) that she is moving on from Ben. I would guess that she might be the most shocked by Ben’s skinny-dipping adventures and hopefully that made her glad he dumped her when he did.
  • Kacie says it’s hard to feel like she wasn’t good enough but that it takes two people to fall in love. I think eventually (if not already) Kacie will be really thankful for her family and the values they represent.
  • And now, Courtney! First the women get to all talk about her while she’s backstage and can’t hear them. It’s really gossipy and doesn’t bring out the best in anyone.
  • The general consensus is that Courtney meant everything she said and was trying to be hurtful.
  • Casey says that Courtney was a “sweet, sincere friend” and that she felt uncomfortable through the whole process.
  • Kacie and Emily both comment that they saw that sweet, charming side that Courtney had and that she showed to Ben. Kacie says she didn’t know who to believe, which person Courtney was but that she hopes, for Ben’s sake, the nice Courtney is the real Courtney.
  • Emily says that when she did see that nicer side to Courtney, that’s when she tried to apologize because she thought maybe she had been wrong. We all remember how that apology went, right?
  • Basically, they all agree that Courtney did not make an effort to get along with them.
  • When Courtney comes in she seems very subdued. She thinks the girls are fair in their judgements and says she would do many things differently.
  • Blakely wants to know why Courtney thought it was okay to call her a stripper and Courtney admits there was no reason to say it.
  • Courtney admits that she should have accepted Emily’s apology and that the joke she made to Kacie early on was distasteful. She says she was extremely uncomfortable and feels humiliated by her actions
  • She does break down a little at one point and cries and says, “I take it all back.” It’s hard to know really if she’s upset by what she did and said or she’s upset more by the repercussions of her actions, especially now that she’s being torn apart in the media.
  • At one point she says, about Ben, “I cared for him”. There’s a definite pause before she follows it with “and still do.” Makes me think that if they are engaged, it’s already on the rocks.
  • Here’s what I think about Courtney: I can believe that she regrets her actions. She didn’t come off looking good and life probably has been hard for her since the show ended. I can also believe that she has it in her to be a sweet, caring, sincere person. That’s the person she has largely been with Ben, that’s who she was with Casey, and that’s who she was with her family. She also has it in her to be a rude, unforgiving, unkind person and that’s who we mostly saw on the show. We all, as humans, have those two sides to us. Saying a kind thing to one person doesn’t cancel out our unkind actions to someone else. Bottom line: Courtney has it in her to be extremely unkind, as we all do, but she didn’t really seem to hesitate on acting out that unkindness. That’s a red flag for any relationship. Someone who’s kind to you and rude to your waiter, is a rude person.
  • One more observation: I do believe that Courtney is pretty insecure. I think when people are physically attractive (as Courtney is, whether you like her personality or not) we expect them to have matching confidence but that isn’t always the case.
  • The rest (the part where Ben comes out) was pretty boring, as I find Ben himself to be. When he came out and sat down and looked at all the women he said, “Welcome to my nightmare,” which got some laughs but I thought was actually pretty disrespectful to those women. The highlight was when Emily told him he sucked at saying goodbye to the women.
  • Well, next week we get to see Ben’s final choice? Any bets/guesses?



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